Let's just take a moment to celebrate everything thus far. In the past year, you:
Graduated a four year degree- filled with ups and downs, lots of struggle, and lots of joy, the most amazing friends and peers, living on a beach basically, allowed yourself to choose creativity, you traveled the world- living in three countries, you learned a new language, you allowed yourself to be open again and again after heartbreak, you learned to trust, you learned loss, you helped other people grow and through their struggles, you learned endless amounts of knowledge. you learned to be assertive, strong. you learned to listen.
You accepted the uncertainty of the future. You returned to a place that shaped you (costa rica), and another place that shaped you (cape town). You decided to move to Cape Town. You worked. You admitted defeat when it came knocking and your door and then quickly saw how it opened a different door. You walked right through. You started a second degree even though you were fearful of the judgements that would come. You now know so much more than you did before. You are understanding a new culture, a different way of life. These things are so important- more important than all the worries that zip through your mind by the minutes.
I recently stumbled upon a lot of writing from a Peruvian girl on her blog, Como Como, and specifically, Peeling In. She is inspiring me to take a moment and be thankful and proud of myself. To look back on just the last year and think, WOAH, i accomplished a shit ton of life stuff. Everyday, we are so WORRIED that we are not enough, that we are not doing enough, or what we should be doing. But we are. We are exactly where we are supposed to be in this moment. Everything has brought us here thus far. And that is enough.
Take a deep breath. You are enough.
(I would highly advise taking a moment to write about even the past few months, or weeks, and give yourself a pat on the back. You are doing great!